I feel sad. Maybe.
Maybe I’m disgusted because I’m broke. Or maybe I’m only upset I am broke because I can’t buy cigarettes?
So what am I going to do. 
I’m home alone I feel sad because I’m allowing myself to be. 
What am I going to do to fix it?
What is going to be my healthy solution 

My healthy resource plan is:
Smoke a bowl outside in the beautiful weather
Finish my last cigarette
Make a cup of tea
Go and dye my hair bright red because red hair makes me feel beautiful and I deserve to feel that way
Take a bubble bath
Organize my room and maybe some decorations for it
Re-read things for my Philosophy quiz tomorrow
Play Batman on PS3
See boyfriend (hopefully)
Stay up late on Reddit
Go to class tomorrow and take my quiz
Come home and nap before working on more room decorations

I will not cut because I’m letting myself be alone and sad

You need to understand that I’ll never be the girl that begs you to stay. If you decide to walk out of my life, I might be sad for a little while but know that I’ll never chase you. I’ll just let you go.

Midnight thoughts (I may love you, but i’ll never need you)